Kids on PacMom

My ten-year old niece Yanna, whose TV viewing habit is limited to Disney Channel and MTV, caught sight of a dancing Dionesia Pacquiao on a magazine and blurted out: “Mama, she’s creepy!”

Of course, my sister Odie couldn’t help but burst out laughing at my niece’s innocent but somehow truthful observation. It was at that point when Yanna joined in the laughter when her brother Bubbi, aged 12, entered the room and demanded, “Hey, you two, what’s so funny?”

“Kuya, look, it’s Pacquiao’s mommy,” was Yanna’s way of explaining.

And Bubbi’s quick retort?

“Kayo talaga! It’s just Pacquiao pretending to be a girl!”

Straight from the Big Mouth of Babes

Last weekend over lunch...

INDIE : (On my sister's buffalo wings.)

           "Gert's cooking is sarap." 

ME : "How about mama's?"

INDIE : "Yeah..."

           (This said as if she was asked at gunpoint.)

ME : "How about my soup?"

INDIE : "The knorr pork cubes are sarap."

Uhmm, did you just spill the beans, darling? Or the cubes rather?

Cheap Shot, Baby

My youngest sister Gert's series of "who's older" questions must have finally got to Indie and—

GERT : Who's older me or Mama Dra?

INDIE : But you're fatter, right?

Where Did That Come From?

In the car on our way to lunch with my nephews who came all the way from Batangas...

ME (38): Where do you want to eat guys?

MOJO (7): McDonald’s—

BUBBI (11): Hey, we didn’t go this far just to eat at McDo!
                  (pregnant pause)
      I learned that from my fat ass dad!

Okay, so where did that come from?

Bad, Bad Weather

The weather seems to have developed a taste for mind games lately and last Saturday was a proud display of the mastery it has somehow gained.

But I was not to be outwitted. On the car ride on our way to Balayan for my nephew Mojo's 7th birthday, I came prepared with sunglasses in my bag in case the sun decides to shine and jacket in hand in case the rain chooses to fall. Either way, I was determined not to lose the game.

And so it went. From Boracay hot to Baguio cold. From a major downpour to a light drizzle. From dry roads to flooded highways. From ominous dark clouds to promising blue skies.


I hurriedly put on my jacket right before it was about to rain and off when it was about to stop. I quickly wore my shades when the sun was about to come out—not wanting to give it a chance to hurt my eyes—and just as quickly slid them to the top of my head just before it became too dark. This went on and on until finally I did not have enough energy to keep up with the weather and its bag of tricks.

Around 10 kilometers away from our destination, the sun was mockingly back to its old hot self but I was just too tired to care. I refused to take off my jacket in spite of the growing heat nor wear my shades back over my eyes despite the migraine-inducing brightness outside. I sat morosely and stared defiantly ahead, not once glancing upward where the weather was sure to be gloating in its apparent victory over the hapless human being that was me.

Of Kids and Baby-Making

These days Indie has this new interest in the "production" of a sibling and...

INDIE: "Mommy, I will make a sister."

ME: "No, darling, it's papa and mommy who will make your sister."

INDIE: "Okay. So how do you make her?"

Uhmmm... Isn't it a bit too early for the birds and the bees?

Seasoned Traveler

Little Indie seems to think of herself as one. She's perfectly at ease at big airports. She appears to be no stranger to take offs and touchdowns. And shows every indication of familiarity with on-board routine.

During a flight from Bangkok to Manila, upon seeing the stewardesses with the food trolley, she immediately formed a megaphone-like circle over her mouth and dutifully announced to all passengers:

"Eating time, eating time!"

The Naked Truth

My husband Nubs was about to slip into his boxers when little Indie came bursting into the room and got the biggest shock of her young life — the sight of her father in his naked un-glory.

And —

"Papa has a tail! He's a monkey! A big monkey!"

A is for...

INDIE : Inay, A is for—

LOLA : Apple.

INDIE : Ant!

LOLA : Airplane.

INDIE : Alligator!

LOLA : Axe.

INDIE : Apricot!

LOLA : (Long pause to think of easy A-words for 3 year-old Indie's benefit.)

INDIE : Auroraaaaaa!!!!!!!

Aurora is her Lola's first name...